[22/06/2011][00:00AM]Hi Lololi. Kemon achhish tui? Aj k tor shathhe phone e kothha hoyechhe. Tao tor shathhe kothha bolte ichha korchhe. Coz me’s really sad right now. Tui amader computer practical exam er shomoy ei bepar e bolechhili. But tao me kept hoping to hear something positive from you. It’s SO NOT fair!! I always used to think that after H.S.C., it would always be me& you against the whole world!! I just can’t believe that now I’m standing all alone in darkness. Even though I’ve heard your decision before & again today, my eyes are still searching for you, hoping that maybe you would appear out of nowhere with a candle in your hands and together we’ll find our way out. Aroni!! Keno?? Keno amar worst fear reality hoye gelo?? Ami shuru thhekei bhoy petam j jokhon asli jang start hobe, tokhon jodi tui amake majh pothhei rekhe chole jash!! Even Taba also warned me about this. Shey amake bolechhilo j tokey shathhe niye jate eto shopno na dekhi. Karon tui…amar cheye onek reasonable. Actually……ami jantam j tui rejected hole kokhonoi fight back korbi na. And tui always nijer agey tor familyr bepare chinta korbi. But tao!! Keno j ami erokom!! Anyways, aj k tor kachh thheke OCPD-r kothha shune amar onek moja legechhe. Boggo stupidta k bolechhilam. But fokinni ta believe kore nai. Tar kothha hochhe j, koekta symptoms mile jawa manei ei na j shei disease shotti shotti achhey. Fokinni taholey ki hole bujhbo j shei disease achhey?? Bloody asshole kothhakar. Amar j OCPD achhey tar arekta ‘Utkrishto’ udahoron holo j amra jokhon class 8 e alada section e chhilam, tokhon o ami reality accept korte pari nai. Ami jantam j amra alada section e & ebhabei pura year thhaka lagbe. But tao ami bhabtam j eito kichhudiner moddhei amra ekshathhe hoye jabo. Jai hok, tor kachh thheke jokhon details e symptoms gula shunlam tokhon mone holo j asholeo achhey amar. Nahole eto details shoho miley jabe ki kore, right?? Jai hok, aj k na, janish, ami kich-h-h-hu kori nai!! Pura din waste giyechhe amar, shasti hishabe. Maishar shathhe kothha bolar por thheke shudhu TV dekhechhi. Obossho exam shesh howar por thheke first time mone hochhilo j asholeo amar exam shesh. Etodin jeita mone hoy nai. Karon etodin to super busy chhilam net niye. Din bol r raat bol. Chyaen ki nind bole kichhui nei/pai nai. TVr schedule eto ulta-palta hoye giyechhilo j ki bolbo!! Tui hoyto bhabchhish j amar jonno bhaloi holo. Rest note parchhi. But na!! I miss the busyness, staying up all night, having back aches, missing meals, having sleepy eyes but still not giving in. I HATE going to bed early, I HATE having NOTHING to do all day, I HATE having free time to watch TV all day!! I feel so useless right now!! When does this torture end?? Kobe shesh hobe amar shaasti!!<sob><sob><sniff><sniff>Mmm…me gotta go. Kal k abar stupid Dustbin achhey. K jane exam e ki korbo!! Ichha moto andaje shob answer kore dibo. Who cares anyway!!! [09:43PM]Hi Lololi. Kemon achhish?? I know you’re not reading this right now ( I mean while I’m writing this) but still I feel like talking to you. Tui ekhono khalamonir basha thheke ferot eshechhish naki jani na. Amar kichhu bhalo lagchhe na. K jane eibar amar shasti ki life-long naki. Aj keo pura boring ekta din gelo. Shara din TV dekha chhara r kichhui kori nai. Shetao j khub mojar chhilo tan a. Oooh! Aj k Gulaal repeat dekhechhi. Amar khub raag uthhechhe. Plus mon kharap o hoyechhe. Haramjadi Gulaal!! Ami bujhi na, shob serial ei keno main nayikara shohoje karo love accept korte pare na?? Stupid kothhakar!! Fokinni ta basha chhere chole giyechhe. Kesar eto cute kore kanna korechhe!! Amar khubi mon kharap hoye giyechhilo. R khubi raag uthhchhilo fokinni betir upor. Stupid beti!! Toke etto love kore!! Etto care kore!! R tui pattai dish na!! Tao abar tor HUSBAND!!! Offffffff!!!!!!!!!! Serial dekheo mone shanti pachhi na!! Kal k stupid Boggo ta eshe jabe. Ami r toke blog-ish letter o likhte parbo na hoyto. Boggo chole jawar por o jodi dekhi j net thhik hoy nai, tahole dhore raakh shei moment thhekei amar matam manano shuru hoye jabe. Plus ami zombie hoye jabo. Aj k even ‘Gopi Vauu’ ( Gopi bahu bolar kothha, but oi scary mohilata ebhabei bole) dekheo moja lagey nai, ba hashi ashe nai. R Sanayar shei third class acting er third class serial dekhe to emniteo kokhono bhalo lagey na. Tao bhebechhilam j aste aste hoyto bhalo laga shuru korbe. Na, joto dekhchhi aro totoi Sanaya k thhash thhash thhappor marte ichha kore. Eke to Sanayar acting ektuo bhalo lagey na, tar modhhe character to super gaiya!! Bujhai jai j ekta meye k jor kore gaiyya shajano hoyechhe. Tao abar beshhi gaiyya. Er cheye to ‘Gopi Vauu’ o bhalo. At least shey illiterate, tai tar gaiyya-ness shojjo kora jai. Emon ek bhab jeno jiboneo kono boro office ba jaiga dekhe nai, jiboneo western dress pora meye dekhe nai, etoi innocent shey!! Faizlami korar jaiga pain a!! Ekhon to Indian shob fokinni gulai western dress pore beray!! R pura city te ekmatro nayok er office ei job kora lagbe!! Chhechri gaiyya chhemri!! Seriously, dekhlei mone hoy j ‘Chhemri’ bole thhu mere ashi mukher upor. Anyways, castle dekhe mone hoyechhe as usual bomi kore dei. Thhak, details e na jawai bhalo. Oita niye kothha bola mane blood pressure barano shudhu shudhu. Ek matro How I Met Your Mother dekhei shanty lagey. But ami ekhon okhane Barneyr (♥♥) shathhe ekta meyer mil hok chai. Meyeta k Barney seriously pochhondo korechhilo. Even life e first time meyeta k seriously ‘Date’ o korechhe., jeita naki Barney kore na obviously. But meyeta jokhon takey bole j shey serious relationship chai, tokhon Barney abar ‘Barney’ hoye giyechhe. Er por to meyeta cholei jai. But er pore k episode e Barney bolechhilo j shey o settle korte chai. But maybe he’s already lost the ‘Right Girl’. So me’s hoping that shei ‘Right Girl’ will come back in future episodes & Barney will settle down with her. Shei meyeta KHUB shundor na, obviously Barney Neil Patrick harris er shathhe picture perfect match mone howar moto kono meye ache kina amar shondeho. But she’s better than Robin. Achha, ami keno eita niye tor kachhe bokbok kore jachhi tui dekhish na jeneo?? Okay, ami abar boi porte jawar agey aj k important ki holo sheita bole jai. Aj k hotat dupur bela abbu/pu office thheke phone kore janalo j abar naki oi ‘lok’ phone korbe amar shathhe kothha bolar jonno. Amar to shunei raag uthhe giyechhilo j bar bar khali amar shathhe keno kothha bolte dhoriye dei!! Tuition fee niye amar shathhe to kothha bole labh nai. R eita chhara ja ja janar dorkar shegula ami onektai jani. Jai hok, shondhar dike ‘oi lok’ phone korlo. Shurutei amake jiggesh korchhe j ami keno shob rekhe Korea tei jete chai. Ami bollam j manush tahole America e keno jete chai?? Tao oil ok bokbok shuru korlo j nishchoi kono special reason achhe jar jonno ami Korea choose korlam. Oil ok naki kono ek din bashai ashbe special meeting korar jonno eita niye. Tokhon amake bola lagbe j ami exactly keno Korea te interested. Amar eto raag uthhe achhe janish na!! Eita abar kon dhoroner question?? Korea na hoye jodi onno kono common country naam boltam taholeo ki ebhabe specific reason jante cheto?? Stupid kothhakar!! Ekhon ami oi lokke ki bolbo kichhui buzchhi na!! Ami to r eita bolte pari na j ‘Ek din ami r amar friend miley Pretty Boys & Girls dekhchhilam. R Taejun & Kiseop k dekhe lole felchhilam. Hotat amar friend suggest korlo j Korea te porte gele kemon hoy?? R amio shanonde raji hoye gelam!!’ Ami jodi etao bolte jai j Korear culture, tradition egula amar bhalo lagey, ami oi country culture niye onek kichhu jani, taholeo to problem thheke jai. Tokhon jodi jiggesh kore j ami ki mone kore ei country culture e interested holam?? Ki bolbo?? Amar ei curisiotyr source holo ‘Pretty Boys & Girls’?? Ekta TV showr upor base kore ami life ere to boro decision niyechhi?? Obviously ami to r bolte parbo na j ami onek chinta bhabna kore, research korei decision niyechhi. Tahole question uthhbe j ami eto research korar time pelam kokhon?? Amar to H.S.C. cholchhilo!! Ami tor bolte parbo na j ami H.S.C.r majhkhanei kichhu patta na diye laptop & net chaliyechhi!! Ami jodi mithha boli j egula ami last year research korechhi, tahole question uthhbe j last year ami net pelam ki kore?? R jodi agey thhekei jantam shob, tahole er agey kokhono boli nai keno?? Amar ekhon oi stupid lok k dhore lathhi marte ichha korchhe. Ei stupid lok I nishchoi pur mathay ulta-palta ideas dhukachhe!! Korea te giye o-o-nek problem hobe, eshob bole pu k aro bhehkachhe!! Jani na ki hobe shei special ‘meeting’ e. Sheita jai hok giye, net j ekhono ashlo na!! <sob><sob> Ami gelam. Bye.
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